Conversation with My Dragon

I’m sure you are aware of your own “inner dragon” voice—that negative, bullying voice that speaks to you sometimes, when you want to take a risk, or when you experience a roadblock or a setback.

It can even come up when you experience success, when that’s outside your comfort zone.

Yesterday, I was struggling to re-organize and clarify some concepts in my book, The Creative Heroine’s Path. I was getting nowhere, and I felt lost and discouraged.

Here’s a sample of the “conversation” I had with my inner dragon last night—it’s more like a monologue, because we hear our inner dragons’ voices as our own:

“I’m a 2-bit, talentless hack who has nothing worthwhile to say.” (That kind of exaggeration was a clue that I was in the grips of my inner dragon.)

Woman with dragon shadow

“I can’t do this. I’ll never finish this book. And then everyone will know what a fraud I am.”

“My mind isn’t good enough. I have too many connected thoughts that lead to nowhere.”

“I’m going to let everyone else down. I’m going to let myself down.”

“I should just give up. I want to give up.”

So, I decided to reach out.

I told my husband that I was struggling, and he reminded me not to “abuse” my creativity. (Don’t you love it when others quote your own advice to you—advice that you are clearly not following?) He told me to stop pushing it and let it go until tomorrow. It was good advice, to give myself permission to take a break.

I also contacted a dear friend, a painter who reminded me that she attended my retreat and my 10-week workshop last year—and she left both of them feeling inspired, with new connections, visions, and artistic endeavors. She asked what I was struggling with, and she offered to meet for coffee, to lend me support.

Sometimes, you need your “champions” to remind you that you really are talented and worthy, and that you have something valuable to say.

So, don’t wallow in the muck with your inner dragon.

Reach out. And give yourself a break.

Posted in Inner Critic, Support, Writing.